Is Saturday 10th April, and I wake up to A Very Sunny Day! I have been unavoidably detained all week on Very Serious Business Matter, so have just come back to Blog. Sadly cannot reveal nature of Very Serious Matter at this juncture, but may be able to lift veil of secrecy in future. Anyway, is sunny. We set off for supermarket early as Two, (aka The Wily One) has important stuff to do relating to the horses. Is Grand National today, so nuff said. We have very quiet drive to supermarket, Two refrains from Sharp Intakes of Breath, Criticisms, and Sad Shakes of Head. Maybe he is reading my blog? I discard Two at supermarket as he takes forever reading ingredients on each item. I head for the clothing section, as feel need for Little Treat.I now come to Possible Sad Mistake. Regretfully and possibly disastrously, I purchase a pair of black leggings. I may sport these for night out at pub, (karioke tonight). Is that how you spell kareoke? Ah that looks better. Back to the leggings. Will I resemble raddled old earwig in black leggings? Can I get away with it? I also purchase long white blouse which will cover most of me down to mid-thigh. Will this be definitive Mutton Dressed as Lamb? If I hear snorts of derision from Two, shall probably attack him with poker.
Back home, laden with the necessities of life, i.e. scones, flowers, new clothes, Daily Telegraph, Ready Meal for supper and bottles of plonk. Two informs me the price of plonk has risen alarmingly, but is essential for Keeping Up Spirits of IMPS, or OAPS as more commonly known. (for definition of IMPS see Very Old Blog.)
Shall resume blog after have tried on leggings. Watch this space.
Can smell strong odour of TCP, and discover Two has spilt a whole bottle in bathroom. He is devoted to this tincture and sloshes it on like aftershave. I do not know why, and I do not ask. Maybe he drinks it as well. Note he has bought huge amount of pitted dates, so assume Bowel Problem may be looming again.
Am seriously considering painting toenails now. Skin still fails to achieve youthful elasticity, but decide maybe years of neglect have given miracle cream very tough challenge. Will persevere.
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