Snipped.

Is Friday and have just returned from local hairdresser, not 'cum to basin duck' this time. Have had drastic Trim, as hair was Getting Out of Control. Yes, even with Very Large Indeed Rollers and copious quantities of setting-lotion, laughing Cavalier look was failing to Hold Position. Jovial male hairdresser, (I have been before), has snipped me a trifle shorter than I wanted. Deja vu. Now have to attempt inserting Very Large Indeed Rollers into much less hair. Having discussed how Very Fine my hair is, was persuaded to purchase Inter-Continental-Ballistic Missile Size can of Very Very Firm Hold Mousse. Should be interesting, but at least will be spared setting-lotion trickling down back. Think combination of V.L.I.Rollers and V.V.F.H. Mousse will raise hair above level of jowels, probably to somewhere in region of eyebrows. Will report back, if can see through tears. Think will try wig again. Did I mention wig? Bought at local market, is shiny, straight, and makes me look about fourteen in downstairs mirror, (dim lighting) and like Someone Who Shouldn't Be Allowed Out On Own in upstairs mirror. Have not confidence to actually Wear It Out, alone or otherwise.

Two is still coughing in alarming fashion, and preventing me from hearing vital news items, etc.etc. Will he ever Go Out? Is like permanent bloody fixture on sofa, or dining room chair.